Friday, August 12, 2011
Baby cuteness.
I have a ton of updates to do, but wanted to post this pic my friend Holly took of Kam--how cute is this?! (For the record, we did promptly remove the dirty hose from his mouth after the photo was snapped...just sayin'.) (More to come! I just need a couple more hours in the day, that's all.)
Monday, July 18, 2011
Finally an update.
Look at me! I'm up for the Bad Blogger of the Year Award! ;)
Sorry for my lack of updates. Truly, we've settled into our new normal fairly well and I'd like to say I have an excuse for my blogging hiatus. But I don't. (Well, besides just being busy in our new "1+1=3" scenario.)
The last few weeks have been so interesting. Up until then, Kamron's mode of operation was consistently stoic. He'd mill about and explore, but overall seemed to be keeping his new life at arm's length. I kind of felt like if he could talk he might say, "Yeah, y'all (yes, he'd have a southern twang...) are real nice and all and I've had some fun times, but I'm ready to go back home now. 'kay?"
Having walked this adoption road before--and in the not-so-distant past at that--I knew this sort of "operating at the periphery" was normal for many kids, Nedy included, and that this too shall pass. On a related note, I am amazed at how much I am able to draw from our experience with Nedy as we navigate these early days with Kamron. With Ned, I was constantly worried about her emotional state of being. (Actually, worried is probably an understatement. Obsessed is more accurate.) I would read and read and then read some more and get progressively more entrenched in all that "could be wrong" with our attachment. If you've ever read anything on attachment, you know how quickly you can assign issues. In doing so, I was hyper-alert at all times, looking for symptoms and signs and generally driving. myself. insane. What did I learn from it? Not to do it again! Really. What I failed to fully understand the first time around is that "instant attachment" is a lie. Many parents claim it on blogs (example: "Day 3. She is attaching perfectly.") but then when you get to know them and talk it out in real life, you find that, more often than not, they were afraid to voice the "real deal" because undoubtedly someone would respond by telling them, "But this is what you wanted." As if the fact that it is HARD makes you want the child less. Goodness. But I digress.
My point is, Kamron's early months of cautious stoicism are normal and--dare I say it--good. He's not seeking to flirt for fear that without it his needs would go unmet. I believe, because of the excellent care he received from his loving foster family, that he expects we will take care of him. I am so thankful for that. He's smartly approaching us with cautiousness because, while I think he knows we will meet his every need, I am pretty sure he's wondering who will pop into his life next to take over that caretaking. Given his early experiences, I'd say cautiousness is a completely fair and appropriate approach.
And now to what makes the past couple weeks interesting. Basically, he's coming out of his shell. He started smiling...a lot. (Oh my gosh, his dimples are just adorable. And he has this way of smiling where the very corners of his mouth turn down to form the cutest smirk.) And he's laughing out loud. (His foster family told us he did this, and now we finally get to hear it!) And he comes over to greet me when I get in from work. And he's hugging back. And occasionally planting an open-mouth, wet-as-heck kiss on my lips. He remains resistant to close eye contact when he's being held, but his eye contact otherwise is steadily improving, so I expect this will come with time, too. Day by day, he's allowing us in more and more. I learned through experience with Nedy that true attachment is a months and years long process, not an event. Having "walked the road" before is allowing me to experience our process with Kamron differently; more patiently...more sanely. ;)
In other news, Kamron began cruising a lot and taking steps a couple weeks ago. He is taking his time, practicing here and there, and as you saw in my video post a couple days ago, recently began wobbly walking distances of 10 steps or more, to which Nedy and I squeal a harmonious chorus of "YAAAAYYYYYY, KAMRON!"
The development of his communication is so fun to watch. He can say Mama, but never on command. I think he's got a bit of a stubborn streak. :) He can say Mao Mao (our cat Hank has been "Mao Mao" since Nedy was little), can "meeeoooow" to the cat, can say dog (gog), cup (guk), coo coo like our clock (goo goo) and a few other one-time mimicries. When I sing "Itsy Bitsy Spider" he moves his hands in the spider motion and even puts his hands over his head for the "out comes the sun" part. He loves singing and songs, especially the ABC song. The letters S ("ssssss") and V ("vvv-vvv-veeee" with a tickle) always make him laugh. When he is done with eating he motions "all done" in sign language and knows the word ("mow") and sign for "more", too.
Last Thursday he had his 12-month well baby check. He is in the 99th percentile for height and weight. He is almost 28 pounds now! He is healthy and on-track developmentally. (Of course, as always happens three days following a trip to the pediatrician's office, he now has a horrible chest cold complete with wheezing and terrible coughing. Our Sunday morning trip to urgent care revealed that dreaded "it's viral, nothing to do but wait it out" diagnosis. Poor baby.)
Nedy is a Rockstar of a big sister. She has so seamlessly adjusted to sharing her world with her brother. And the funny stuff that comes out of her mouth is just icing on the cake. For instance:
So that's it for now. I will try to get some pictures up sometime soon. I need to get back to my weekly blogging. I am hoping by saying that out loud I will actually do it...
Life is good. :)
Sorry for my lack of updates. Truly, we've settled into our new normal fairly well and I'd like to say I have an excuse for my blogging hiatus. But I don't. (Well, besides just being busy in our new "1+1=3" scenario.)
The last few weeks have been so interesting. Up until then, Kamron's mode of operation was consistently stoic. He'd mill about and explore, but overall seemed to be keeping his new life at arm's length. I kind of felt like if he could talk he might say, "Yeah, y'all (yes, he'd have a southern twang...) are real nice and all and I've had some fun times, but I'm ready to go back home now. 'kay?"
Having walked this adoption road before--and in the not-so-distant past at that--I knew this sort of "operating at the periphery" was normal for many kids, Nedy included, and that this too shall pass. On a related note, I am amazed at how much I am able to draw from our experience with Nedy as we navigate these early days with Kamron. With Ned, I was constantly worried about her emotional state of being. (Actually, worried is probably an understatement. Obsessed is more accurate.) I would read and read and then read some more and get progressively more entrenched in all that "could be wrong" with our attachment. If you've ever read anything on attachment, you know how quickly you can assign issues. In doing so, I was hyper-alert at all times, looking for symptoms and signs and generally driving. myself. insane. What did I learn from it? Not to do it again! Really. What I failed to fully understand the first time around is that "instant attachment" is a lie. Many parents claim it on blogs (example: "Day 3. She is attaching perfectly.") but then when you get to know them and talk it out in real life, you find that, more often than not, they were afraid to voice the "real deal" because undoubtedly someone would respond by telling them, "But this is what you wanted." As if the fact that it is HARD makes you want the child less. Goodness. But I digress.
My point is, Kamron's early months of cautious stoicism are normal and--dare I say it--good. He's not seeking to flirt for fear that without it his needs would go unmet. I believe, because of the excellent care he received from his loving foster family, that he expects we will take care of him. I am so thankful for that. He's smartly approaching us with cautiousness because, while I think he knows we will meet his every need, I am pretty sure he's wondering who will pop into his life next to take over that caretaking. Given his early experiences, I'd say cautiousness is a completely fair and appropriate approach.
And now to what makes the past couple weeks interesting. Basically, he's coming out of his shell. He started smiling...a lot. (Oh my gosh, his dimples are just adorable. And he has this way of smiling where the very corners of his mouth turn down to form the cutest smirk.) And he's laughing out loud. (His foster family told us he did this, and now we finally get to hear it!) And he comes over to greet me when I get in from work. And he's hugging back. And occasionally planting an open-mouth, wet-as-heck kiss on my lips. He remains resistant to close eye contact when he's being held, but his eye contact otherwise is steadily improving, so I expect this will come with time, too. Day by day, he's allowing us in more and more. I learned through experience with Nedy that true attachment is a months and years long process, not an event. Having "walked the road" before is allowing me to experience our process with Kamron differently; more patiently...more sanely. ;)
In other news, Kamron began cruising a lot and taking steps a couple weeks ago. He is taking his time, practicing here and there, and as you saw in my video post a couple days ago, recently began wobbly walking distances of 10 steps or more, to which Nedy and I squeal a harmonious chorus of "YAAAAYYYYYY, KAMRON!"
The development of his communication is so fun to watch. He can say Mama, but never on command. I think he's got a bit of a stubborn streak. :) He can say Mao Mao (our cat Hank has been "Mao Mao" since Nedy was little), can "meeeoooow" to the cat, can say dog (gog), cup (guk), coo coo like our clock (goo goo) and a few other one-time mimicries. When I sing "Itsy Bitsy Spider" he moves his hands in the spider motion and even puts his hands over his head for the "out comes the sun" part. He loves singing and songs, especially the ABC song. The letters S ("ssssss") and V ("vvv-vvv-veeee" with a tickle) always make him laugh. When he is done with eating he motions "all done" in sign language and knows the word ("mow") and sign for "more", too.
Last Thursday he had his 12-month well baby check. He is in the 99th percentile for height and weight. He is almost 28 pounds now! He is healthy and on-track developmentally. (Of course, as always happens three days following a trip to the pediatrician's office, he now has a horrible chest cold complete with wheezing and terrible coughing. Our Sunday morning trip to urgent care revealed that dreaded "it's viral, nothing to do but wait it out" diagnosis. Poor baby.)
Nedy is a Rockstar of a big sister. She has so seamlessly adjusted to sharing her world with her brother. And the funny stuff that comes out of her mouth is just icing on the cake. For instance:
Nedy: "Mama, how do babies get out of ladies' tummies?"Does it get any funnier? You should have seen Dan's face behind Nedy as this conversation is happening. It was priceless.
Me: "Through their girl parts. They push the baby out."
Nedy: "I'm confused."
Me: "Well, it's kind of like when you need to make a poop. Your body tells you that it's time and you go to the toilet and push it out. When a lady's body tells her that it's time for the baby to come out, she gets some help from a doctor or some other baby helper and they tell her when to push. And then the baby comes out."
Nedy: "From her girl parts?"
Me: "Yes."
Nedy: (long pause...thinking...) "I'm definitely adopting my kids because sometimes when I push a poop out my butt hurts and babies are bigger than poopers."
So that's it for now. I will try to get some pictures up sometime soon. I need to get back to my weekly blogging. I am hoping by saying that out loud I will actually do it...
Life is good. :)
Sunday, July 17, 2011
someone has something to show you... :)
Yay Kamron! He is so proud of himself. Trust me when I say the feeling is mutual. :)
(And I am still working on a real post with actual words, but my free time these days is...limited. Stay tuned.)
Monday, June 20, 2011
Kamron's 1st Birthday Party
In Korea, first birthdays are a big deal. A really big deal--an important right of passage in the Korean culture to be celebrated in a BIG way. It usually involves elaborate decorating/food preparation and the rental of a hall to accommodate the many guests. Think wedding. That big.
Initially--as in many, many months ago--I had this grand plan to throw Kamron a more traditional dol. We were going to go to the Korean bakery in Chicago and pick up all of the traditional baked goods and have it catered by a Korean restaurant, etc., etc. I thought maybe 70 guests or so.
Yeah, not the best plan for an introverted (whether by personality or by current circumstance?) kiddo who is still adjusting to his new day-to-day. I really, really struggled with how to handle his first birthday. In the end we decided to follow our gut and throw him a very small family party...on a boat! My sister Lisa did the research for us to charter the Milwaukee Maiden on Father's Day. I think it was a really good decision for Kamron. Aside from some minor upset when he was dressed in his hanbok, I think he enjoyed himself.
Kamron enjoyed crawling around the boat and cruising around from chair to chair. Exploring new surroundings circled by familiar people is Kamron's idea of a good time, I think.
See what I mean about upset around the hanbok? I guess Kam isn't a fan of getting dressed up. Look closely--big crocodile tears and everything.
Mama to the rescue. His hanbok is lovely--and particularly special because his foster family gave it to him. (As an aside, pink and purple are not associated with girls in Korea. It's refreshing. They're just colors like all the other colors.)
Time for the dol jabi ritual where Kamron would choose his future! We all gathered around to see what would attract him. First choice? Drum roll, please...
The bowl of rice! There seem to be various meanings--all related--associated with some selections. The most commonly held meaning associated with choosing rice means the child will always have food and shelter.
Kamron was pleased to finally be able to mouth his sister's play rice. He's had his eye on it for some time now.
I think Kamron could have stopped at the rice. He was satisfied. Nedy decided to encourage him a bit by playing with some of the stuff herself.
He fell for it! He's back in the game! What would his second choice be? Knife (good cook), stethoscope (doctor), money (rich)...??? Such a tough choice. I thought for a second it was going to be the knife, but he passed it over and came around to...
The book! Scholarly! I like it.
And finally, the ruler was his third choice. A ruler means good at handiwork/making things. Score!
The crowd is pleased! Good work, Kam!
Later on he decided the paintbrush was super cool; he held it for a loooooong time. Artist maybe? :)
Cake time!
How funny. The child who gets into absolutely everything decides to go at the cake all gingerly. (He was probably shocked that no one was saying, "Nooooooooooo, Kamron...")
Yuuuuuuuummmmmmmm.
For the record, gift opening on a boat is just more fun. :)
생일 축하해, Kamron!
Initially--as in many, many months ago--I had this grand plan to throw Kamron a more traditional dol. We were going to go to the Korean bakery in Chicago and pick up all of the traditional baked goods and have it catered by a Korean restaurant, etc., etc. I thought maybe 70 guests or so.
Yeah, not the best plan for an introverted (whether by personality or by current circumstance?) kiddo who is still adjusting to his new day-to-day. I really, really struggled with how to handle his first birthday. In the end we decided to follow our gut and throw him a very small family party...on a boat! My sister Lisa did the research for us to charter the Milwaukee Maiden on Father's Day. I think it was a really good decision for Kamron. Aside from some minor upset when he was dressed in his hanbok, I think he enjoyed himself.
Kamron enjoyed crawling around the boat and cruising around from chair to chair. Exploring new surroundings circled by familiar people is Kamron's idea of a good time, I think.
See what I mean about upset around the hanbok? I guess Kam isn't a fan of getting dressed up. Look closely--big crocodile tears and everything. 
Mama to the rescue. His hanbok is lovely--and particularly special because his foster family gave it to him. (As an aside, pink and purple are not associated with girls in Korea. It's refreshing. They're just colors like all the other colors.)
Time for the dol jabi ritual where Kamron would choose his future! We all gathered around to see what would attract him. First choice? Drum roll, please...
The bowl of rice! There seem to be various meanings--all related--associated with some selections. The most commonly held meaning associated with choosing rice means the child will always have food and shelter. 
Kamron was pleased to finally be able to mouth his sister's play rice. He's had his eye on it for some time now.
I think Kamron could have stopped at the rice. He was satisfied. Nedy decided to encourage him a bit by playing with some of the stuff herself. 
He fell for it! He's back in the game! What would his second choice be? Knife (good cook), stethoscope (doctor), money (rich)...??? Such a tough choice. I thought for a second it was going to be the knife, but he passed it over and came around to...
The book! Scholarly! I like it. 
And finally, the ruler was his third choice. A ruler means good at handiwork/making things. Score!
The crowd is pleased! Good work, Kam!
Later on he decided the paintbrush was super cool; he held it for a loooooong time. Artist maybe? :)
Cake time! 
How funny. The child who gets into absolutely everything decides to go at the cake all gingerly. (He was probably shocked that no one was saying, "Nooooooooooo, Kamron...") 
Yuuuuuuuummmmmmmm.
For the record, gift opening on a boat is just more fun. :)
생일 축하해, Kamron!Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Guess who's one?
Kamron turned one today! We must have sang 'happy birthday' to him 50 times--turns out he likes that song a lot. (Not as much as the theme song to Angelina Ballerina, but that's for another post...) Anyway, after his usual marathon morning nap, Nana and Papa surprised us by bringing Josiah, Samuel and Julia over to share in the birthday cheer. They even brought a tiny heart-shaped cake!
(From this angle it totally looks like a hamburger bun, but I assure you it was indeed a small heart-shaped pound cake.)
After that, per our family tradition, we put Kam through the torture of taking more photos than he was interested in being part of, though given his young age and short time with us, we only subjected him to 15 minutes or so. We did let him know that next year he would be fully tortured with the full hour plus session. :)
Taking photos was so funny today--the difference between a child "trained" by my ever-present camera for two years and one who is still adjusting to his new family was...well...very evident. :) Kamron is such a serious little guy whenever we are out and about, though he has begun to ham it up quite a bit at home. His smile is so adorable--it lights up his whole face--but you'll have to take my word for it, because Kam decided to be mostly stoic for his one year old birthday pics. (And as you can see, Ned was not at all stoic about celebrating her little brother's first birthday. Ned is, after all, rarely described by the word "stoic.")
Our first stop was that concrete wall at UWM again. I love that wall for background contrast and I just wasn't happy with the last round of pics there. (Guess what? I'm not satisfied with these either, but I need to wait for Kam to be home a while longer before I try again. I was hoping to capture the smiles we get at home here, but when he's away from home he clams up a bit. Brave little guy, such a huge series of life adjustments for such a little being. And then there's that dang teething...ugh.)
Handsome little fella.
We appliqued the "1" on his shirt. Dan and I have to work on our appliqueing skills. :)
Just look at that face.
And big sister, who, after inspecting Kamron's shirt this morning (and pointing out it's flaws, I might add) announced, "Hey Mama, I'm gonna wear my 3 shirt today and that way me and Kamron are both wearing numbers and we'll know how old we are when we look at these pictures, okay?" That Ned. She's a thinker.
I had to go to work for a couple hours this afternoon after the brief stop at the concrete wall. When I got home, everyone was rested and ready to go so we walked to Big Bay Park for some time at the lake. Kamron has been to the lake a few times. He likes it a lot. He likes the sound of waves and would eat the entire beach of sand if we let him. (I'll never understand that--why do kids repeatedly try to eat sand? One try I get--heck it might be sugar for goodness sake--but after that first gritty tongue coating? I mean, they go back for more?!?) Needless to say, no photos of Kam on the sand because it takes all of us to police his sand-eating ways.
Feet! Soooooo cute. He crosses his feet a lot.
Kam likes the breakwater. He laughs and laughs when I run him out on it.
And we brought the tripod for some family shots! I think these came out super cute.
Ned's "scrunched nose" look of irritation. It's sooooooo funny.
Happy birthday, Kam. We love you. We can't wait to watch you bloom over the next year.
(From this angle it totally looks like a hamburger bun, but I assure you it was indeed a small heart-shaped pound cake.)After that, per our family tradition, we put Kam through the torture of taking more photos than he was interested in being part of, though given his young age and short time with us, we only subjected him to 15 minutes or so. We did let him know that next year he would be fully tortured with the full hour plus session. :)
Taking photos was so funny today--the difference between a child "trained" by my ever-present camera for two years and one who is still adjusting to his new family was...well...very evident. :) Kamron is such a serious little guy whenever we are out and about, though he has begun to ham it up quite a bit at home. His smile is so adorable--it lights up his whole face--but you'll have to take my word for it, because Kam decided to be mostly stoic for his one year old birthday pics. (And as you can see, Ned was not at all stoic about celebrating her little brother's first birthday. Ned is, after all, rarely described by the word "stoic.")
Our first stop was that concrete wall at UWM again. I love that wall for background contrast and I just wasn't happy with the last round of pics there. (Guess what? I'm not satisfied with these either, but I need to wait for Kam to be home a while longer before I try again. I was hoping to capture the smiles we get at home here, but when he's away from home he clams up a bit. Brave little guy, such a huge series of life adjustments for such a little being. And then there's that dang teething...ugh.)
Handsome little fella.
We appliqued the "1" on his shirt. Dan and I have to work on our appliqueing skills. :)
Just look at that face. 
And big sister, who, after inspecting Kamron's shirt this morning (and pointing out it's flaws, I might add) announced, "Hey Mama, I'm gonna wear my 3 shirt today and that way me and Kamron are both wearing numbers and we'll know how old we are when we look at these pictures, okay?" That Ned. She's a thinker. 
I had to go to work for a couple hours this afternoon after the brief stop at the concrete wall. When I got home, everyone was rested and ready to go so we walked to Big Bay Park for some time at the lake. Kamron has been to the lake a few times. He likes it a lot. He likes the sound of waves and would eat the entire beach of sand if we let him. (I'll never understand that--why do kids repeatedly try to eat sand? One try I get--heck it might be sugar for goodness sake--but after that first gritty tongue coating? I mean, they go back for more?!?) Needless to say, no photos of Kam on the sand because it takes all of us to police his sand-eating ways. 
Feet! Soooooo cute. He crosses his feet a lot. 
Kam likes the breakwater. He laughs and laughs when I run him out on it. 
And we brought the tripod for some family shots! I think these came out super cute. 
Ned's "scrunched nose" look of irritation. It's sooooooo funny.
Happy birthday, Kam. We love you. We can't wait to watch you bloom over the next year.
Monday, June 6, 2011
Covered Bridge Park
Photos from an impromptu stop at Covered Bridge Park in Cedarburg Saturday--good thing my camera is almost always in the car. I just looooove the series of Kam and his chubby little dimpled hands. And the last shot on the post--let's just say heart melting into a puddle of goo. :)
I should have an update post up sometime this week. In short, multiple kiddo illness aside, we are doing really well. Dare I say it, we might even be getting the hang of this two kiddo thing...knock on wood. :)
I should have an update post up sometime this week. In short, multiple kiddo illness aside, we are doing really well. Dare I say it, we might even be getting the hang of this two kiddo thing...knock on wood. :)
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